Our work as sex educators and pleasure activists has the power to ignite change far beyond people’s bedrooms — Isn’t that a sex thing? asked a high school friend when I showed her pictures from a recent Shibari performance. — You don’t have sex on stage, do you? she continued before I had a chance to respond. — No, no, it is an erotic art form, but that doesn’t…

Welcome to my world on Medium, and beyond — Hi there! First, I want to thank you so much for being here—I appreciate you immensely. About me I’ve been a storyteller of sorts my whole life. Starting as a graphic designer, I moved into creative/art direction, set dressing, event styling, and more. …

All of my sexy pieces in one place — In the words of my favorite erotica writer Anais Nin: “We write to taste life twice, in the moment and in retrospect.” And what better part to relive than our sex-lives? I do love writing about sex and sexuality, but it wasn’t until I sat down to complete this list…

A full collection of my writings on narcissistic abuse; what it is, how to identify it, and how to deal with it, during and after — Over the last year, I’ve written many stories about my experiences in a relationship with a verbally abusive narcissist, as well as my process of healing and dealing with the aftermath. Through this process, I’ve connected with many who share similar experiences, in search of resources to make sense of…

Finally, my German broadcasting license fee is going towards something I’ll actually watch — If you live in Germany, you can’t escape the obligatory monthly 18 euro license fee that every household must contribute to finance the public broadcasting services. (Trust me, I’ve tried and it backfired). …

About the women who were attacked and killed for saying no to men—and why I won’t shut up about this. — It was just a simple question, you can just say no. If you’re so paranoid why do you even leave home? Back story When I wrote my essay in November, about the man who asked to skip the condom on the first date, I didn’t expect it to inspire a whole series…

Why learning rope bondage and self-tying is one of the best gifts you could give yourself — Who am I as a rope bottom without my rigger? What is my place in this world without them? Where do I go from here? Those were some of the questions I asked myself when I parted ways with the rigger I had tied with weekly for the past year…

How to prevent and alleviate situational erectile dysfunction — condom related, or otherwise — Did you or your partner ever temporarily lose erection while fumbling to put on a condom? Perhaps you’d built anticipation to have sex for days and then it just wouldn’t work. Did the fantasy of a lifetime unfold in front of your eyes, but then Jimmy refused to rise to…

The harmful ‘crazy ex-girlfriend’ trope and the myth of female hysteria — When I met my now ex-husband in my twenties, I quickly learned that a large number of the women in his life, past and present, either had been or were crazy. …