I'm mortified by the actions and attitudes of white people, as I am by a huge majority of the comments here.
I've written extensively about verbal and emotional abuse, repeatedly stating that "when someone tells you that you hurt them; when someone expresses that they're in pain, you don't get to tell them they're not". This is the definition of gaslighting! White people, we NEED to listen first, without letting that visceral reaction to getting called out get the best of us. This is bigger than any one person and we must learn not to let our personal reactions get in the way. I know I'm part of the problem. I acknowledge my place and part in this. I don't have the solutions, but the least I can do is open my ears, mind and heart to hear you.
Thank you for using your voice to speak your truth!